Sigh, blogger was being a bit of a rectum this evening. It denied both myself and I'm sure many other people the joys of logging on onto their blogs to posts, or even being able to read their favourite publications. Sigh.

First off, before i get down to the post proper, I'd like to say a hello and thank you to the two people who have visited me from Australia (or at least have Australian IP addresses...) and the many people who have visited me from Europe and the US of A. Though apparantly none have been visiting from the UK, which is silly becuase I know I have (unless it doesn't count me...). Still, thank you for reading! (notice I refrained from saying 'G'day' in that paragraph! Not one for steroptyping me.) Actually, what if I did rely only of stereotypes?

So, as I strolled down the road today after a delectable crumpet and tea for one's breakfast, I realised, much to my utmost dismay, that I had left my bowler hat resting on the mantle. Quick as a flash, I opened my brolly and flew back to my humble mansion in Kensington. After that hilarious episode, I got on the locomotive bound for France (See where I'm going here? - DickyBod (don't say france you plebs...)). Ah, 'twas a most joyous journey, including a hilarious story about a muffin! Truly amazing!

We then arrived in French-land, where I espied many a man wearing a blue and white striped jersey, a beret, and with a string of onions around his neck riding a bicycle! How strange...

Ok, gonna stop there before i get complained at...

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Another dud trip to London today! Since many people may not know who these delightful people are, I will include the group photo now.

This, is the group photo. Click, and be enlightened.

From left to right : Stephen (Baz) Julia/Jules (Astrojaxx) Tom (Moolb) Richard (Nonnesuch) Dave (Teradud) Dave (Deutsches) and Jon (Megatrobe).

Got that? Ok.

As Baz was so happy to point out so well in his blog, I didn't get there on time. I apologise, especially to Jules and Tom, who I know where just dying to meet me (me being the wonderful and fascinating guy I am) but 'tis a good tale, which of course means good blogging.

5 am - I am hit on the nose by a cat. Repeatedly.

7 am - Mother comes and wakes me up in preperation for not being late

8 am - Cats have fight... on me...

8.15 am - Cat #2 pushes speaker for hi-fi off of windowsill.

8.30 am - Alarm goes off. Hit snooze button to go off again in 10 minutes, then again at 8.45 then again every 5 minutes.

10.20 am - Wake up. SH*T!!!

10.30 am - Have 15 heart attacks after running to station, in time to miss the train I would have been missing if it had not been delayed by 3 minutes (good fortune bestowed on me by Otis, possibly in preperation for the dispicable greater-evil he will eventually inflict.) Be thankful I got that train duds!!! If I hadn't I'd have been an HOUR and 40 minuets late! MWAHAHHAHA... aaaaaaaaaaanyway.

So, I got to Charing Cross, and having been threatened with a hammer from the Baz, I gathered with the rest of the duds, glanced my eye over Jules and Tom (who, if you hadn't realised, I had never met) and followed on the oddysey.

First stop! The British Library. This one was slightly odd, but per request of Tom, who apparantly has a 'thing' for books. I ain't borrowing one off of him for a while... Outside there was a lovely agent of Otis, obviously placed as a Sentinel for the Library, that the evil teachings he made may never be disturbed. He seemed to be having a great time drawing circles. Inside, the brilliance continued to even greater heights. First up, a fantastic bench, in the guise of a book! It appears to be devouring two elderly people... scaaaaaaaaaaaaaaary!

Yes well, moving on. In an exhibition, we saw many brilliant things! Such as: The Beatles! No kidding! Sorry it blurred a little.... Next up: a renaissance cyborg! Now that is an outfit I aspire to own! THink of the good you could do! You could be a superhero!

Good things about being a literary cyborg:

• Planks of wood at side of head prevent side attacks
• Small right handed hammer, to deal out justice and whack non-believers
• Left handed giant penknife! Look out for the 2005 USB version! Allows for close up sword action
• Utility belt, including : short swords and long knives, throwing knives, and a bible to convert them before you kill them... or deal justice.. whatever...
• Large reading stand/torso armour.

Ok, enough of this. Also, we saw a typewriter. BUT! This was no ordinary typewriter! Ooh no! This was a typewriter with far too many keys than was nessacary. One's for different fonts, italics, accents, punctuation, a row of numbers that went up to 15... Madness. Look at the bloomin' (blurréd?) keys! Ludicrous... and not the rapper...

I saw a book that I believe suited Sarah rather well. I did look for a copy in the bookshop afterwards, but alas...

Then we came across (on our search for food after the library) a shop that I never believed existed. I had always wondered where Burberry could be bought. I had realised that no shop i knew actually sold the damn stuff, so I came to the conclusion it homed in on the idiocy in peoples minds and then spawned upon them like some fetid parasite. Which indeed it is. But, i was then incredibly shocked when, horror of horrors, this shop hoved into view around a corner. A veritable Chav stronghold/spawning den. After resisting the urge to commit arson, we moved on. After a rather horrific meal in Burger King (be still my palpitating heart) we decided to trek to Trafalger Square. Being from outside the M25, Jules and Tom were unused to the rigours of City life. I was of course horrified to discover they weren't country bumpkins or hillbillies. But anyway. In Trafalgar Square I took a photo of an old police phone box (TARDIS functions deactivated unfortunately) which also was the first coherent picture I'd managed to get of Jules all day. Lord knows I'd been trying hard enough... My previous best attempt was this one , but she blinked dern her!

We then went to the Science Museum (after walking past the V&A), where I got a previously shown picture of the USS Enterprise and The Next Generation's Captain! (I love that photo :D)

Anyhoo. I also managed to get a picture of the Edison Televisor! Such a better brand name! Sorry for the blur on that one... we then left, due to overcrowding of Little People (children, as they are better known) and went next door (a lot) to the Natural History Museum. Not much happened here. More munchkins, lots of cepholapods, and a large, anorexic ground sloth.

Then, I became assured of Otis's evil intent. He had placed agents through London to track us, even hiring the aid of that notorious evil-doer Keyser Soze, hiding in a bookshop window amongst the Tintin books.

And that was Dud trip to london!

Have a nice vening. Must sign off now, things are going mad....