October 25, 2004

Greetings those in the 'blog reading world! I have decided to blog again! Isn't that hoopy?

"Hey, you sass that hoopy Ford Prefect? There's a frood who REALLY knows where his towel is!"

I'm going to spend the rest of this evening unwinding slightly, since fullscale war takes it outta ya. So, just sitting here, listening to Wuthering Heights (freakingly good), waiting for Photobucket to stop being an arse, then i shall write up this post, write a CV, phone Sarah, go to sleep, wake up, go job hunting, taunt/congratulate the baz, answer the phone to Sarah, go to sleep, go to london, come back, phone Sarah, go to sleep, wake up, go to Stompp's, come back, answer the phone to Sarah, go to sleep, wake up, do zilch Friday, hopefully go to Oxford (if i can do the blooming organisation this time) come back, go back to school.

That's a rather full week. How's photobucket doing?.... Woo, it actually worked! Now the next 15...

What should i do to entertain you?... I'll do some singing!

I ain't happy, i'm feeling glad
I got sunshine, in a bag
I'm useless, but not for long
My future, is coming on
I ain't happy, i'm feeling glad
I got sunshine, in a bag
I'm useless, but not for long
My future, is coming on
It's coming on
It's coming on
It's coming on
It's coming on

Hm, still not done. Ok, Nightwish

Fly to a dream
Far across the sea
All the burdens gone
Open the chest once more!
Dark chest of wonders
seen through the eyes
Of the one with pure heart
Once, so long ago

Still going... Erm... Back to Gorillaz

Finally someone let me out of my cage,
Now, time for me is nothing cos im counting no age
Now i couldnt be there, now you shouldnt be scared,
I'm good at repairs, and Im under each snare,
Intangible
bet you didnt think so i command you to,
Panoramic view
Look i'll make it all managable
Pick and choose, sit and lose, all you different crews
Chicks and dudes who d'you think is really kicking tunes?
Picture you getting down in a picture tube
Like you lit the fuse
You think it's fictional, mystical, maybe
Spiritual, hearable what clears your view when your too crazy,
lifeless to know the definition of what life is,
priceless to you becasue I put you on the hype sh*t
you like it?
Gun smoking
Righteous but wanted
Psychic (something)
Who possess you in one go

chorus

DAMN still going! My voice is starting to give out! Oh no.. Just done! Woo ok!

-

If you think the next sentence is too geeky stop reading. I won my first battle of Warhammer 40,000 (the 'toy soldiers' dear) today! And even 1200 points on opposing teams. Here follows the battle report :

Imperial Guard Vs Eldar Ulthwé and Chaos World Eaters.

Initial Deployment : Ulthwé and CWE - Imperial Guard

Turn 1

Imperial Guard

Movement Phase

The IG instantly moved it's Chimaera behind the protective cover of a burnt out fortified wall, dropping off the unit inside.

Shooting Phase

The Leman Russ tank fired its turret at the Eldar Black Guardian First Unit, the hit reducing the squad of 8 to a mere 1.

Assault Phase

-

Ulthwé and World Eaters

Movement Phase

The Khorne Bezerkers moved forward first, closing in on the Chimaera's position, Kharne the Betrayer and 2 Aspiring Champions leading the squad of Bezerkers and Bloodletters. The Defiler did not move, nor did the Predator tank. Ulthwé moved all troops forward, the Vyper Jetbike flying ahead to initiate an early strike. The single remaining troop of the unit marched ahead bravely, while the Dire Avenger Aspect Warriors caught up with the Wraithlord.

Shooting Phase

No Ulthwé troops were in a position to attack, and thus utilised thier Fleet of Foot ability to run ahead, finishing, for a time, the massive advance. The Twin-Linked and side-sponson mounted Lascannons on the Chaos Predator fired in synch, disabling all weapons of the Imperial Guard's Sentinal Walker. It then fired it's Havok Missle Launchers at a nearby unit, killing one of the humans instantly. The Defiler braced itself, before firing it's massive Battle Cannon at the same squad. The calculated shot left 6 immobilised on the floor, relying only on thier internal Bionics to survive.

Assault Phase

-

Turn 2

Imperial Guard

Movement Phase

Four of the troops living only on Bionics live long enough to realise that they are no longer working.

Shooting Phase

The Leman Russ continued it's barrage of devastaing fire from it's main cannon, aiming for the Dire Avenger unit. However, it's inaccuracy caused it to miss, the shot straying to a formation of rocks, that exploded in a shower of gravel.

Assault Phase

-

Ulthwé and World Eaters

Movement Phase

Alone, the single troop of the devastated unit makes a break for safety, running further form the battle. The rest of the Ulthwé force storm forward, the Vyper gaining an impressive lead. The Khorne units continue thier stoic march, the Bloodletter Daemon stomping ahead in an impressive display, closing the gap on the Chimaera. With almost the entirety of both forces forward, the pressure on the Imperial Guard position is mounting.

Shooting Phase

Out of range with both the Bright Lance of the Ulthwé Wraithlord and the Lascannons of the Chaos Predator, the only chance of a shot this turn is lost.

Assault Phase

With a mighty roar that split the air, the Daemonic Bloodletter charges on the Chimaera unit.

Turn 3

Imperial Guard

Movement Phase

-

Shooting Phase

Once again, the Leman Russ fires it's massive cannon, it's aim true. One Dire Avenger is immediately destroyed in the explosion, the rest survive to tell the tale. The blast falls also on the Wraithlord, it's armour proving ineffective as the pilot is injured.The Chimaera unit stand ready to face the challenge the massive hulking form of the Bloodletter. With superb shooting, they injure it.

Assault Phase

The crew then rushes the Bloodletter, closing the gap of combat, attacking it at a melée postion. They injure it further, it know sits on the brink of death.

Ulthwé and World Eaters

Movement Phase

The entire Bezerker squad rush forward, heartened by the deaths of many at the hands of thier daemon. The Eldar follow suit, all units but the Vyper advancing.

Shooting Phase

The Battle Cannon of the Defiler once more lets fly, the shot smashing into the middle of once Imperium Guard Squad, leaving a further 8 on their Bionics to sustain them while they lie on the ground. The Predator fires all Lascannons at the Leman Russ, the massive hail of fire stunning the crew inside. The Havok Launcher fires far wide of it's target, leaving the Eldar to continue the maelstrom. However, both the Wraithlord's Bright Lance and the Vyper's Shuriken Cannon bouncing off of the armour with little effect. The Seer Council enters the fray. The Warlocks Augment their powers to the 3 Farseers, extending the range of their potent psychic abilities. However, repeated attempts to disorient the Leman Russ and the Sentinel with the powerful Eldritch Storm prove ineffective.

Assault Phase

The fierce melée between the Bloodletter comes to a shattering end, when the daemon is killed by a well placed attack.

Turn 4

Imperial Guard

Movement Phase

After the massive amount of disabled troops were left on Bionics in the unit after the Battle Cannon hit, none were left for long. 2 troops that had been fighting the Bloodletter also met the same fate, the squad by the Chimaera being reduced.

Shooting Phase

For what would turn out to be the final time, the Leman Russ fired, it's shot killing four of the remaining troops of Guardians.

Assualt Phase

-

Ulthwé and World Eaters

Movement Phase

The Dire Avenger and Guardian squads moved into a position where they could easily move to engage the enemy in long range combat. The Wraithlord moved forward into a closer position, to extend the effectiveness of it's weapons. The lone soldier from the first squad finally retreats off of the limits of the battlefield. The Bezerkers follow in the footsteps of the Bloodletter, finally in a postion where they can finish what the Daemon started, and finish off the Chimaera unit.

Final Positions

Shooting Phase.

Finally, significant gains were made in the battle for the Eldar and Chaos forces. After a moment of prioritising and strategising, the attack begun. The first Farseer's power was augmented, allowing it to begin a Mind War with the Imperial Guard Psyker. The battle of wills was lost by the Imperial Guard, and the effort cost the psyker his life. The second attempt at augmenting failed, but the third successfully Augmented the second Farseer. The Eldritch Storm from the Seer Council span the Leman Russ to a position were it's rear armour was then exposed; a critical move that spelt the rest of the conflicts destiny. The Predator shook the crew, but the Leman Russ's destruction was integral to the success of the battle. The Vyper jetbike fired 3 shots from it's Shuriken Cannon, two slamming into the side of the Sentinal, destroying it instantly. The Wraithlord then stepped in to finish what the Predator has started. One shot from the Bright Lance penetrated the armour of the Leman Russ, and finally, the vehicle was destroyed. The Guardians and Dire Avengers ran forward, finally in a position to fire back at thier foe.

Assault Phase

The Khorne Bezerkers moment had come. A lengthy battle at close combat ensued, Kharne the Betrayer first entering alone, closely followed by his men. The struggle ended with 4 of the Chaos Marines and 8 Imperial Guard dead.

Turn 5

Imperial Guard

Movement Phase

The Chimaera moved out of it's cover to attempt to head off the remaining Khorne Bezerkers while Kharne killed the rest of the unit, with both a Psyker and a Commissar dead.

Shooting Phase

The Chimaera fired one heavy Bolter at the Bezerkers, but missed.

Assualt Phase

Seeing imminent defeat, Commisar Yarrick, the hero of Armageddon, began a hasty retreat to safety, chased by Kharne, determined to finish the fight, leaving only the remnants of the Imperial Guard force to face the full force of the enemy.

Ulthwé and World Eaters

Movement Phase

The Guardians moved into range with the enemy, the Dire Avngers close behind. the Vyper remained stationary, already in effective range, while the Wraithlord stomped into range of the Chimaera. The Khorne Bezerkers ran forward to attack the unit behind the Chimaera, many even climbing over the tank in order to reach them.

Shooting Phase

The Guardians finally opened fire, along with the Dire Avengers. The unit of 3 was instantly cut down in the hail of Shuriken fire. The Predator saw it's chance to do it's share of damage, firing all weapons at the Chimaera. The blast ruptured the engine, and the tank blew apart in a massive fireball of wreckage. 8 of the Khorne Bezerkers in the vicinty where blown apart, leaving only 5 of the squad alive. The Havok launcher fired at the remaining unit, killing 1 of the troops. The Vyper followed suit, killing two with its massive Shurikens. The Imperial Guard were left with only 3.

Assault Phase

The remaining Khorne Bezerkers charged, joined by Kharne, surrounding the remaining Imperial Guard. The assault was quick.

TOTAL ANNIHILATION

All Imperial Guardsmen died, the only survivour being the 'hero' of Armageddon, Commisar Yarrick, who fled.

Ulthwé lost only 12 Guardians and 1 Dire Avenger, one Guardian fled.

The World Eaters lost all but 4 Khorne Bezerkers, one Aspiring Champion, the Defiler, the Predator and Kharne the Betrayer.

-

Uber geeky no? At least you had some pretty pictures to look at, you lucky chaps!

Wow, I started this blog at 7, and 'tis now 10.30. Had best finish up, format the headings, then get cracking on that CV...

Have fun, foolish Mon-Keigh.

Tutty-Bye
Eldrad Ulthran

Oh wait! Just remembered! Remember I asked for the photo requests? I have some!

For the /fpoole : My computer area (plus cat)

General Area (plus Cat)
Moniter (plus Cat)
Big box thing (plus trainers)

Ok, really Tutty-bye
Eldrad Ulthran

Playing: Star Wars Battlefront/Warhammer 40k Dawn of War
Reading: More Bunny Suicides
Listening to: "Wuthering Heights" - Kate Bush
Watching: This screen...
Annoyed with: Sarah not being in her room...
Confused about: Sarah not being in her room...
Mood: Tired, vaguely happy. Little zoned out.
Song currently stuck in head: "Wuthering Heights" - Kate Bush
Favourite Song of the Minute: 'Dark Chest Of Wonders' - Nightwish

2109 words! 2010 now... 2011.. that'll do!

2013... Ok, formatting done! Took a while. Now to publish. Oh, new link to side. Fpooles sci fi blog. Good read!

2139 words!

3 comments:

Dauve said...

Congratulations, I think you put more words in that post than I've ever put into one post.

I didn't bother to read all that warhammer rubbish past the first turn, got a tad dull. I never did see the appeal of moving toy soldiers round a mat whilst throwing dice and measuring distances, checking the handbook all along :)

Lewis said...

Tinboy.
Good battle, though.

Chard said...

TINBOY!??!?!

I tried to undercoat as many as possible before the fight. Then I realised I had 8 Guardians to make and 4 Dire Avengers to finish. Arse.