An unprecedented attempt

My friends and readers, I am going to make an attempt at a feat that may or may not be fabulous. I am going to try and write a vaguely long blog post WITHOUT the use of pictures or excessive presses of Return. I'm not sure if it'll be in anyway interesting since, hey lets face it, it's one of mine but I shall endeavour none the less and you may all go WOO and YAY in the comments. And I think that's enough for an introduction, so end paragraph number 1

This actually may end up being a stream of consciousness blog, but for the moment I should keep to some sort of structure to grasp your interest which will lure you to read the rest without realising the turgid schpiel it actually is. Which this second paragraph is rapidly becoming actually, so i should actually get on and say something of interest (HA!). Erm. So yeh, as Stompp so rightly pointed out in the comments to last post last thursday he pulled up the STOMPP-FAMILY-AUTOMOBILE-OF-DOOM and passed into my grubby little hands (thanks to his Mafioso style connections; well his sister i guess) a rather spiffy and exceedingly retro Mega Drive II (the II meaning its a wee bit smaller) and a plethora of pre-'95 titles. And waht a collection they be! While the majority are admittedly the tried-and-tested Sidescrolling Shooter genre, there are some other little gems in there, including Splatterhouse 2, a game that had about the same effect in '93 as GTA:SA had earlier in the year. VERY tame in comparison however. Another undisputed classing among the bunch is the infamous Zero Wing, a game made well known not by tremendous graphical enhancements or originality in the gameplay, but by that lovable rogue Cats who so proudly declares that our base no longer belong to us. No, in fact, "All your base are belong to us" he quite proudly states. And rightly so. For, all our base do belong to him. And so, for great justice, take off every Zig. Classic stuff! The humour in the Engrish rantings of Cats however are second only to the utmost hilarity of Fifa '95, produced before EA went EAvil. While not exactly as faithful a football simulator as the likes of PES, nor with the fantastical commentary of Worldwike Soccer '96 (go stompp :P) it does has some moments of hilarity in the instances such as when, after being tackled by an opposing player I seek revenge by pushing him halfway across the pitch, and then as he writhes on the floor in agony I kick the ball into his prone form. Noone tackles me...

So, with a paragraph about both retro gaming and football i have probably turned most of my audience away, so i shall attempt to appeal to the prospective bankers amongst you by describing the monopoly win I had over my mother not so long ago. It was pretty quick as monopoly games go, only 35 minutes. However, thats not to say it was not actionpacked. A quick purchase on the first to cycles yielded all the properties but Leicester Square, and some tactical buying meant that only two sets where owned: my mother had the reds, I the greens. However, with some very lucky dice rolls and a good set of chance and community chest cards, I had enough money to start developing the properties sooner, a full set of houses appearing 2 turns before mum started. Later, sensing her to be about to hit the greens again, I put another 3 houses on, leaving me with 2 on each. She did indeed hit the greens, and I again waited for her to circle the board before i put another set on, which she again hit. The sudden influx of income meant the few times I hit her reds were resisted easily, and I indulged in another set of houses, leaving me equipped with 4 on each. Mum, who on the 3 house landing had already lost a severe amount of money and the majority of her properties, was not able to withstand the £900 rent a 4 housed green promised, and she rolled the dice tentatively as she approached, though breathed a sigh of relief as she went past unscathed. As she passed Go it seemed her monetary worries were looking up, though she immediately landed on the tax square, losing her hard earned 200 easily. It was only a matter of time before she landed on the Greens, and she called the game. It's true; the Top Hat rocks in monopoly.

So, what else have i done? Other than the splended pastimes listed above, I've developed suspected OCD when it comes to cleaning my room. Not only have i cleaned the floor, but i have also cleaned out under and to the side of my desk, chucked my PS2 magazines, cleaned my bookshelf and sorted my books, sorted my wardrobe and (heaven help us) washed my windows of 20 years worth of gunk. Madness.

In other news, I'm 17 tomorrow. Go me. Woo. Fabulous. Another year. Go me again. Woo and yay. Roxx0rs. Reminds me of a comic strip in fact

See you tomorrow then

'chard