Mickey Mouse THIS, fuckers...

Rant time methinks. I'm in a mood of what I've termed Psychotic Melancholia (eg. I saw a house that looked like it had been gutted by fire and I fought to contain the giggles) and I am more than slightly in hatred of everything and anything. Where is omnipotence when ya need it? A little wrath would be great...

So, to rant. In case you hadn't quite got it from the title, it's to do with my subjects at school, or more accurately, the comments I get about them. In case you don't know yet, my chosen AS level subjects are:

1. Film Studies (Waste)
   
2. Drama (Doss)
   
3. Media Studies (Mickey Mouse)
   
4. English Literature (Yeh, ok, one)

Wait, read that again : "In case you don't know yet, my chosen AS level subjects are"

Do you see the key word there? CHOSEN. I made the choice to do those subjects, just like the rest of you made the choice to do Phsyics, or Maths, or German. You made that choice, I made my choice. Now, Media and Film studies I at least see the reasons for your sneering (even if I hate it) but my real annoyance is when it comes to Drama.

Working example. I'm on MSN as I write this :

The Juggle King says:
what ye rantin' about?
Taydr du oui {Rantin'} says:
Drama
The Juggle King says:
ah hem "THROW your life away..."

Well, no offense to the monarch that juggles, but you do Physics, Chemistry, Computing and Maths. Computing? Jeez, practise what you preach sister.

Drama is one of the things that I don't regret in the slightest. A few reasons I love drama

Physicality

Drama is the most physical subject I do. Those who saw the thing we did in the hall on Auschwitz is a good example. In case you've never noticed, the floor in the hall and the floor in the drama studio might as well be solid concrete they're so hard. More often than not I've left a drama lesson in quite a large degree of pain becuase of it. Lovely memories of that include our piece in Year Ten on the Holocaust, where I had to fall first onto a table, then onto the floor. We rehearsed that scene too many times for my liking. Then, during the actual performance I managed somehow to slam my chin onto the table, whilst being filmed. Oh yah... that wasn't pleasant. Then there was the lovely moment when Alex and Natalie were supposed to be beating me up, by punching me in the face and kicking me while on the floor. Let's just say they got a little too into it. The screams were real.

Creativity

I mean, this one should go without saying. It's a decent outlet for my creative talent. Well, what little I have at least. I can't draw, unless it's a static sword. I can write, i guess, but not tremendously. Besides, at least in drama it's something I am relatively good at, at least to the extent that my terrible self image allows me to believe it. I can express more ideas, and experiment. It's like art, but I'm the picture, the painter, the paint and the brush in one.

Sociality

Drama is great because it has allowed me to meet loads of people that I would not have otherwise. Most of those people I would otherwise have just labelled as 'filthy chavscum' and never spoken too, or just never talked to, no matter how well we might have got on. The Bugsy Malone production has allowed me to mix even more with those people, and with those in the lower years whom I'd never have talked to. MC McC's year 11 nemesis is doing it. I was sitting next to him through most of Thursday's audition, and he was perfectly civil. But like heck I'd have been near him otherwise?

Also, like you do with any group of people you see regularly, you become a very tightnit group of people. We say hi in the corridors, we chat to each other every so often, we see each other outside of school etc. Even the drama trips are out of school hours, and are usually quite a casual affair. It doesn't feel like a subject, more just a group of friends hanging out 4 times a week.

Self-Esteem

The biggy for me. It was only when I was 14 that I became able to talk to the fairer sex with a slightly more relaxed attitude, in comparison to before when I wouldn't have at all. And it coudl have been left at that, but then OOPS i took drama. Suddenly I was in an atmosphere where I knew no-one, and was forced to interact with them and work with them in a more intimate sense than any other subject. What other subject has you rolling over everyone else in the group just to make sure you're comfortable with each other? Haven't done it in English yet. Over those two GCSE years I built several new friendships, and those that weren't friendships were at least mutual respects.

AS level heralded not only a new group for drama, with people from the other group, but also people of the other gender. I had to readjust that comfortable nature I had had to extend to the newcomers, which was instantaneous. Almost in the first minutes of the first lesson we had built those bonds immediatly, and for the first time in my life I was comfortable with it. The 6 girls were immediately part of the gang, and it just felt great to be able to do it all over again. Even though they all came from different backgrounds and had different things to offer the group (particularly Danielle, who I just found in the Prisoner of Azkaban, with her strange coments of murder...) it was great to find myself with the confidence to work with these people straight off, unknown as they were. I still can't do that in any of my other subjects.

Also, there is the obligatory public showings. While I hung to the philosophy that in drama it was ok if i made had to make an idiot of myslef, because everyone else was. Showing it to the public is a different kettle of fish entirely. That required some serious confidence building I can tell ya.

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So, please don't give me shit about doing drama anymore. It's done more for me that the rest of LPBS has, and without it I'd have been a completely different person, likely for the worse.