As an addition...

I have found someone who makes worse puns than me!

See you on thursday

Ovwar

Au revoir indeed. For tomorrow I bid farewell to these sufficiently bombed isles of the British and bid bonjour to those wonderful and yet slightly crazy French peoples in the land of the France. With that convoluted intro out of the way, what else be there to sa? Trinkety tink, and a badger in your nose.

WARNING!!! Only serious nerds (or 40k enthusiasts) wil possibly find the next bit interesting

Finally, after about 2 months, I have gotten around to painting some of my Tau Fire Warriors, which certainly seem to have turned out better than my Guardians however






Woo for Tau sexyness

ERm, what else to say? hmm... Ohh I finally completed all 27 years worth of Garfield, so that is now other on the thar-->
Also added is SSomething Awful, which is providing some giggles recently
what else...
Nothing really. See ya'll soon.
Rather smidgous post this turned out to be....
'chard

Reading: Nothing
Listening to: 'Passion and the Opera' - Nightwish
Watching: Words magically appear in tandem with the appropriate key pressings
Confused about: Nothing much
Annoyed with: My hair
Mood: R0xx0rings!
Favourite Song Of The Moment: 'Fithos Lusec Wecos Vinosec' - Nobuo Uematsu
Song Currently Stuck In Head: 'Matoya's Cave' - Nobuo Uematsu

Organised no?

Honestly, first my room, now my folders. I'm going over all my photos and sorting them, moving my music into seperate files... OCD strikes again...

So yesterday was another jaunt into merry old London Town, to meet with jovial Peterborough Peeps Tom and Julia. Remember them? Well, I sure didnt, though this photo proves otherwise...

Still, i ventured via the Mother Carraige to bromley south, where I met Jon. We purchased our tickets and boarded... THE TRAIN OF DESTINY AND UBERNESS OMGOMG!!!1 We were then accosted at Beckenham Junction by Agent Dave

Who was intent on thwarting us. Still, we overthrew him and returned him to the cheery chappy we all know and love. At Kings Cross, we ventured forth to find Lewis, Tom and Julia. And lookwe did; under signs, in carriages, in Smiths, insides pigeons and even at platform 9 3/4. After 20 minutes we found Tom and Julia, but still no sign of Lewis, until he turned up behind us there and then. Ah wells.

We then decided to go off towards Green Park. Along the way we found a large array of books for sale, including at least 6 copies of Pride and Predjudice. Also there was:

An error that cost Lewis his life to read, and a short book, with a long title..

After a whiles we walked on, past Buckingham Palace where there seemed to be great commotion, and towards Harrods. On the way, Tom had his card eaten by an EVIL ATM OF DOOM

Anyhoo. We went to Harrods which was all well and cool, featuring such sights as the Lego Jango Fett

All the Sin City graphic novels

A rather kickass 60" TV

And the teeniest Laptop ever!


After all this excitement it was decided that food was in order, so we trundled back to Embankment and on to Pizza Hut for food.


And so the group were assembled in all their hungery






Tom, Dave and Lewis had some fun with a rousing game of Mornington Crescent, which i took a vid of if anyone wants. After the food, we ventured to the Science Museum for a spot of world domination

Though MCDaveMcC took the oppertunity to lay down some phat choons

Jon and Julia then pitted each other in a battle of wills

Which resulted in Jon being forced to work in Otis's Lentil Mines


Afterward, we bade all farewell, and Jon Dave and I went back on the train from Victoria, where I was enraged by the person next to us calmly playing her PSP. Curse her feminine gaming blood!

A jolly good day me feels, and was certainly good to see Tom and Julia again. Certainly to be done again.

Night all
'chard

Harry Potter and the Hormonal Imbalance

Just an alternate title.

This is going to be a difficult one. How to say how good the book was without giving away anything major...

Hows about this?

Order of l337ness of HP books (according to the Book of 'chard, Chapter 5 V.2):

1. OotP
2. HBP
3. GoF
4. PoA
5. PS
6. CoS

I still detest CoS with a passion in comparison to the rest. It may as well have been a film version before the book.
So, yes. Not as kicking ass as OotP, simply because one of my predictions was proved right. You dont have to read it if you want to not be spoiled, so fairly warned ye be fan boys.:

Harry won't fight Voldemort, nor will Voldemort be directly involved. The main focal point for us as the nemesis will be a character with ambiguous loyalties. Happened in 3, happened in 6

With that in mind, it makes 6 a llttle less ass kicking as the MoM fight in OotP, though there are some cool moments. The girls will love it...

ARG READ IT YOU BASTARDS!!! I NEED TO TALK ABOUT IT OPENLY!!!

What a perfect evening...

It is 0045. I have had in my possession The Half-Blood Prince for 45 minutes. I am a happy, happy man.

It all began at 10. I met with Rob on the road that is west of the More land, and off we did pace toward our goal. Along the way, Rob became better associated with my robes of divine Sithness (courtesy of the sadly missed Sarah)

We then met up with 2 of Rob's friends (or one of and her friend) who had names i cant remember, and we wandered around with all the drunk chavs for a while, waiting for the Glades to open. When open it finally did,we went and joined the scrum, waiting for midnight, and the start of legal HP6 sales. Ottakars, however, seem to have been involved in the proliferation of a certain card game...

Any hoo, midnight came with racuous cheers, and the 4 of us, plus Rachel and Tom finally got our hands on our prize... and the lord was happy...

And so, thanks to the wheels of the Rachel, I came home.

What struck m most about the journey was this: it was a night when nerds, in all their cosplay glory and chavs, in all their rowdy, drunken, vomity, voilent and abusive glory shared the streets. They walked with each other, the nerds discussing theories and mock duel outcomes, and the chavs recieving ASBOs and been rounded up by officers of the law.
True unity :)

I my friends.... BEAT YOU ALL!!!! MWAHAHAHAHA I R t3h L337!!!

Suck it n00bs!

Life, According to Potato Waffles

"Birds Eyes Waffles go really well with:

sausages, pork chops, lamb chops, chop chop!, melted cheese & Worcestershire sauce (Mmmm), grilled chicken (cluck, cluck), fried eggs, baked beans, boiled eggs (waffle soldiers), chilli sauce, scrambled eggs, salad (off to the gym then?) sizzling bacon, floury baps & tomato ketchp (waffle butty), fish fingers, bikini's (not really), chicken kiev, sausages (can't get enough sausages, can you?), hummus, beef burgers, mushrooms, fishcakes, a full cooked breakfast (big night was it?), roast lamb, top trumps (very '80s), gravy, a glass of wine (or 2), chicken burgers, ham and pickle, gammon, your favourite soap opera (Ricky!!!), salt and vinegar, dodgy sitcoms, sausages...

...in fact they're soooo versatile (grill 'em, bake 'em, fry 'em...) that
THEY'LL GO WITH ANYTHING!"

All the bolds and text sizes are about as accurate as I can get. You can't make this stuff up :D

HERE BE AN EDIT, yarr!

On another note,there are 3 new webcomics on the right. 8-bit theatre and Turn Signals on a Land Raider are pretty much general geek humour (therein lies the appeal I spose) and Calvin and Hobbes is the one we all know and love 'cos of how much it kicks ass. And to the MAD ANONYMOUS COMMENTER! i corrected the spelling, so spleens to yer ass!

And now, a message from our glorious ruler

Greetings, foolish humans! I, Augustus Gloop, have taken over the Chocolate Factory of the late Willy Wonka! I now own all his commercial chocolate enterprises, and have enslaved the Oompa-Loompa creatures to conform to my will! No longer will you pitiful mortals be allowed to enjoy the rich creamy taste of Wonka’s Whipple-Scrumptious Fudgemallow Delight and Wonka’s Nutty Crunch Surprise! Now only I may taste this perfection of confection!!!

Once, I was but a figure of ridicule. The butt of the joke, the playground freak! So my passion for chocolate excelled my girth, but it was a small price to pay for this love. Martha Gregor had a bigger price to pay for her passion, but was her sudden growth the subject of jeers and japes? No, suddenly, all my male peers sought out her favour, to the length that, barely 9 months later she was thin once more...

But I digress. Your taunts and jeers twisted me to ambition; to a lust for power unsated by my parent's enhanced stature in society. I knew I would soon be destined for great things, for a power beyond the schoolboy taunts, beyond this large frame chocolate bestowed on me. I vowed revenge on Wonka for what he had done, for the way his produce had poisoned my body.

For years I haunted the gates of his factory, but I knew the old mans reclusive nature as much as anyone. My infiltration was not going to be easy. But, it seems, fate was on my side. Wonka, the fool, allowed only 5 people into the factory. I hunted all the chocolate i could, an orgy matched only by my youthful years. And at last, I found that gleam of hope, the shimmer of the golden ticket... my ticket to Wonka.

He sensed my intent quickly however, my weakness for chocolate luring me into the tubes of his mixing river. I was trapped, and it seemed my chance was gone before it had even arrived.However, I was determined. When that brat Veruca Salt was also incarcerated by Wonka and his Oompa-Loompa death squads, we formulated a plan. She was easy to manipulate, a stroke of luck I could not have forseen. As I distracted the guards, she let out an ear peircing shriek, incapacitating the O-L's, allowing us to make our escape.

When we met Wonka again, he had already passed his dues and property to that young fool Charlie Bucket. Bucket was powerful, but I had come to far to lose to one such as him. I sacrificed Salt to overpower him, forcing him to sign the deed that named me sole proprietor of the factory,and thus the Oompa Loompa's followed suit, joining me. Bucket was now disposable, and was quickly in the mix of the fast selling "Wonka's Bucket", a confection that told you what was in it once you had eaten it, thus requiring the bucket.

And so you know of my victory, you who read this. But what could stop you telling the world's leaders, what could dissuade you from destroying all I have achieved? Well, without chocalte, man will slowly die out. You have no choice but to follow me. Look into my eyes... you will see the truth...

Lord High Admiral Chocolatier to the Realm, Augustus Gloop

-

The pic at the top was the inspiration for this one. Look at it... you would NOT get between this boy and his chocolate...

Next in this fascinating series: Mike Teavee and his fun with a bowie knife:


'chard

DISCLAIMER: Slightly 'chard industries claim no responsibility for any childhoods shattered as a result of this post.

???

My god... I'm dead!!!


Punching block off of eBay. The reason my right hand is now in quite a bit of pain. Missed once, and clipped the corner with my little finger. Hurts.

My elf fetish comes forth once again... go Stompp :P

And now, the many sides of me (i realised half way that my right side is my best side. Hence the direction change)


Casual chard

sexychard

Slightly visually impaired chard

Slightly freaked chard

Perplexed chard

'guh?' chard

"Ah, I see" 'chard

Scary giggling chard

Morosely ponderous chard

Mysterious assassin chard

Surprised in shadow chard

ARG THERE'S A KNIFE IN MY EYE CALL AN AMBULANCE!!! chard

Whats life without some randomness aye? Just ask Fan. Random is his name, kickass anime appreciation is his game. Should really watch that at some point

On a slightly more serious note, I'm thinking of starting another blog. For why? Everyone reads this one, so I can't really be myself. I cant say stuff that i'd like to say without offending someone. I have to be chirpy happy funny chard, occasionally dipping into a rant or two.

I'd keep this one of course, because I woulndt deprive so much of you of reading material then. I'd probably opnly tell the other ones address to a select few, though you haxx0rz may find it somehow. Still, it would be nice.

Chin chin, and a rinkety tink.
Chard

Playing: ICO
Reading: Harry Potter and the HBP soon.
Listening to: 'Radiation Burns' - Brainfreeze
Watching: Some random film
Annoyed with: My hand
Confused about: blogging
Mood: rawr ^_^
Song currently stuck in head: 'Beauty of the Beast' - Nightwish
Favourite Song of the Minute: 'My Friend (So Long)' - dcTalk

Chaucerre masstte Perrishe!

Ah, my own Canterbury tale today! After wakening at the obscene hour that is 7.30, I trudged downstairs and got in the mobile that is automatical. After a while, mum stopped for a while, turned round and went the other way. So much for MY map reading skills it would seem. Ah wellsy well. Still, the journey wasn't so bad. 60 ish miles in an hour and a half with the musical delights of most of the star warseseses went swiftly. However, the weather seemed to become vaguely inclement rather quickly

But I had some fun with the map, looking for silly places with names like 'Thong', and:


Please, in the realms of good taste could noone at an 'n' to Great Wakering... please god... Ahem, well now you all have in your mind I can move on.

Once we reached the University, Mum took some time negotiating the packed car park in order to find a space, which was an immensely difficult process

We went to the receptiony type bit, passing the Drama place and the place that all my wannabe fizzy-cyst homeboys would have loved

The queue was of course present for the ladies, which provided me with some amusement when I found another with no queue whatsoever. Ahh, those poor females... We waited in the crowd for the information table thingums

Which became very quickly packed

The drama table was unmanned (slackers) so we had a snoop around, going through Joanna Lumley's door

Some people then wittered on about the subject, and I stole a load of paper stuff to read later. Woo! Reading!
After that, we headed back to the table bit, where I saw 3 langley lot, Andrew Vanstone, Nick brabner and some girl i dont know who works in sainsbars.

Then, just for kicks:

Forbidden Erotica, obviously now bidden...

The healthy option

And Pikachu strikes one for racism campaigns worldwide

On the way home again, it seemed far more obvious that Otis was finally mobilising. Working no longer under cover, his forces were acting in broad daylight... my first sign came as I spotted a van, under orders to guard cans of deodorant and antiperspirant

Then, the horizon was filled with metallic beasts... evidently some sort of giant mechanical Sentinel Battlemech...

All seemed connected... but what to? Soon I reached the source.. a power station, which was powering these mechanical beasts, and readying them to destroy the world!!!

However, soon I saw proof that he was mobilising... MOBILE SHIELD GENERATORS!!!


1025? Hmm... 0215... Oh two is!! OTIS!!!!

Eat your heart out Chaucer...
-
Secondarily, Steve Napierski, creator of The Outer Circle (link to left) emailed me the other day:

Richard,

I saw your linkage to the outer circle on your blog page and I just wanted
to say thank you.  Every link helps and you're in no exception.  I
appreciate your support.

Thanks,
Steve

booya! So, I feel obliged to plug. Go read, tis funny and good, and also provides 3 of your daily portions of fruit and veg.
'chard