Comes with PillageX for first 100 orders

Whilst strolling through the site of wonders that is Wikipedia, I came across (please dont ask how...) something wonderful. Let me introduce it with a little bit of spiel:

Imagine you're a woman. Unless you are in fact a woman, in which case skip that one and just be you. You're walking home, its dark... suddenly from up ahead a dark figure comes up to you and asks the time... coudl this man be a rapist?! Oh, if only you hadn't left the mace/gun/grenade/axe on the side when you left for the party! If only there was some way you could feel safe walking these dark lonely streets! As it turns out, the dark figuire was a woman, but even so, the point stands.

So how could you feel safe from rape? Or even, if you were raped, how could you inflict pain on the rapist in order to get away? And how could you prove that he did in fact try to rape you when it comes to court?

Never fear, my dears, for now you have the RapeX!
Observe the official site, and if you are women then cheer your salvation, and if you are men then prepare to wince...

Now, im not about to cheapen something that will obviously set many peoples minds at risk or anything, and if they wish to create a real vagina dentata (as seen in the Lion King) then by all means. I just have a few issues to raise in my deeply cynical mode that will no doubt lead to MORE hatemail (see next post). Let me paint you another scenario. The red bits are for the girls, the blue for the guys, k? (WARNING! STEREOTYPES ABOUND!)

You are with your boyfriend, but things havent been going well. It's not him, it's you, but no matter what you try, you cant bring yourself to say anything to him. He's a nice enough guy and all, and he's funny, and all your friends like him, he's really sensitive, rippling muscles, thoughtful, kind, considerate, sympathetic; the perfect guy. But, the way he talked to that other girl... the one he's 'just friends' with... sigh... why are all men like this? At the end of the day, he's a man, and men are all pigs (and rapists, said that funny Greer woman off the telly)

So, she's a really great girl. Great pair of tits, nice arse, legs from here to Glasgow that, like the garage, aren't afraid to open at the touch of a button. Valentine's day coming up, so her thoughts have naturally turned to 'romantic' and 'loving' things. You know, all that soppy crap like holding hands, roses, and even (god forbid) foreplay. Still, it's worth going through all that stuff. At the end of the day she's a lot better than that girl you had last Friday up against the wall of the club.

But how could you break up with him? He's so sensitive, it would just break his heart, and you couldnt do that to him? After all, you're his first true love, (he said so!) and it would be so hard on him. Oh, what are you to do?

Actually, there was that blonde from the other night. She seemed up for some...

After more stream of consciousness, you and your partner are turning off the light...

...next day, the guy is in hospital having a Patented RapeX surgically removed, with the words "Hey, sorry about this but i dont think we should see each other any more" written in pink marker.

IT COULD HAPPEN!!!

'cynical 'chard