I was astonished this morning to see that I had passed the 100 hits mark. whether that’s shameless advertising in my uk.playstation.com sig or just a genuine interest from my peers, its very gratifying that the mere minutes I invest in making this what it is are appreciated! thank you one and all, and now I like you, you can all toddle off and pledge your allegiance to someone else’s blog, in the realization that I am a sad 15 year old loner with nothing better to do than post my thoughts on an equally sad website that no one goes on.

Anyway, that said, interesting things happened today! If you cast your eye down this list of posts to February 20th, you will see, or if you haven’t/didn't/couldn't be mortared to, you may recollect that the Glades shopping centre was besieged by armed militant. In true Hollywood style, I, a hopeless unknown, unappreciated in life, became mankind’s only hope in destroying these armed assailants. Well, after having defeated them, I had strolled of home, little aware of the plans this group had for me.

So, to today. The copy of FFX-2 that I had wrenched from the grasp of the innocent shopper in Game churning away nicely in my PS2 (32% complete, Chapter 2/5) I stood up, the adrenaline rising as a Queen Coeurl finished my White Mage off in one hit, (FOR THE FIFTH BLODDY TIME RARRRG!!!) to see an unmarked van outside the house opposite. I found this extremely unusual, until a man got in it and drove away. Thinking nothing more of it, I glanced casually back out the window 5 minutes later… TO SEE A DIFFERENT VAN THERE!!! Naturally my mind was on red alert by this time. I ran out into the street, where I wrenched open the back doors of the van. To my absolute disgust I was greeted by the foul stench of rotting carcasses, the putrid smell of death invading my nostrils. A deep mans voice told me to get away, but I was transfixed with horror, too petrified to move. Fish. Boxes of fish, ready to be shipped to those who bought them. What a fool I felt. I let the van go on its way, waving it off. Suddenly it burst into flames, the fuel from the motor spilling out into the road in a fiery torrent, the rather nice smell of barbecued fish in the air. I turned to see a group of militants standing around nonchalantly. I ran into the house and finished the battle (with excellent use of Full Throttle I must say) before grabbing my discarded weapons from nearly 2 months previously, I loaded them and set forth. From behind my mothers car I waited for my moment. Suddenly, I sprang out sideways, laughing maniacally as I sprayed metal death in front of me. I landed in a sea of bullet casings. I reloaded, and ran back behind the car. I thought desperately to myself the same words: “Wrong way klutz, they’re to the left, to…the…LEFT!” Shaking off the embarrassment I lunged again, spraying bullets as I had done before. They fell to the floor grasping wounds. I sauntered back to the house, knowing my work was done.

Well, that was terrible, I know, but I laughed.

I bid you adieu and a Christian
DickyBod

PS Nope, by reading that you have made me safe from any legal action you might have wanted to take against me for such an appalling piece of prose. Why not buy an authentic DickyBod T-shirt?