While i'm here

This wont be substantial, but it's made me giggle over the days:

"I'm sorry, I had no idea my wife was so busy."
"Fear not kind sir, it matters not one whit."
"I'm sorry?"
"It matters not one whit, time is not pressing on me fortunately. Now, some information please; this afternoon I have to visit the town for sundry purposes which wil be of no interest to you,I'm quite sure but never the less I shall rewuire your aid in getting for me some sort of transport, some hired vehicle that is to get me to my first port of call."
"Are you alright?"
"Oh yes! Yes I find the air here most invigorating"
"Well I'm I to deduce from your first announcement that you want a taxi?"
"In a nutshell"
"Case more like it..."

-

"Now this afternoon on BBC2 there is a documentary on Squawking Bird, the leader of the Blackfoot Indians in the late 1860's. Now this beigns at 7 o'clock and goes on for approximately three quarters of an hour"
"I'm sorry are you talking to me?"
"Yes indeed I am, now would it be possible for me to reserve the BBC2 Channel for the duration of this televisual feast?"
"Why don't you talk properly?"
"What?"
"No it isn't"
"What?!"
"It is not possible to reserve the BBC2 channel for the duration of this televisual feast until the moment of the termination of it's ending, thank you so much..."

Ah giggles...