Holy Mother this is going to be a large one...

Ok so I have a lot to blog about. C'est la vie and all that jazz.

With that delightful note i get on with the proceedings, and in todays "find me and follow me" (matinee) we will see:

Red Mercury
Performance
Teh HB pencil
Listening of Rhythmic Tunes
London Town
The Magnificently Festive Erection

So, first up be Red Mercury. In Film a few weeks ago Malyszko made the wonderful news that some director had invited our Film sets to a Cast and Crew screening of his new film. So, I got up at 8 on the Sunday (oh god that was NOT fun) and me and Mum rushed to Eden Park station where I bought my ticket, met t'others and got on the train bound for the Cross that is Charing. In this little crew were all but one of the Nazi's victims, and we jovially japed about the situation all the way there, eventually quite glad to find they weren't still there. After a quick bite to eat we hopped on the Tube and made our way into Camden where we found the Odeon, and sat to watch the rather ripping yarn. All and terrorists and bombs and stuff. The EPC would have been EP. All I have to do is wait for it to come out, then to come on to DVD and I can recommend it to all my (HAHAHA) friends. On the way out though the excitement MOUNTED!!! Yes indeed, for he that plays the Hogwarts caretaker Argus Filch (i forget the name) walked past! He was in the film though, so twas explained slightly but was still vaguely fun and cool.

Tuesday period 2 we slogged into the Drama Studio to be confronted by the expectant and highly threatening visages of the Year 12 Drama groupeths. After some rigourous rehearsal (and waiting for Syd to arrive) we had our second full run through of our exam thingum. We did have to leave out one scene due to incompleteness, but for those who are coming in January (thats all of you, GOT IT?!) worry not as twill be finished and perfect for the performances. It went pretty well, and our intro (starring me, haha) which was only 4 miunutes old went rather well also. Should be good, and you are ALL coming. ALL

(Picture Paragraph 1)
On Friday I and Dave (after a lot of mishaps involving a bicycle and train times) met with the Sarah and Lewis, in order that we could amble to the abode of the Sarah HB to embark upon the journey of hysterical hysteria that only a party can provide. 'pon arrival we were instructed to take a secret mission for the evening, ranging from the humorous to the downright disturbing (mine, 'burp as often as possible for evening' was thankfully on the brighter end of the scale). Met a few new people before the first game (the catastrophically named) musical humps. Seemed to be over rather quickly, due to most people's lack of alcohol (or lack of lack of morals) so Pass the Parcel (the ubiquitous party game) was started, including DARES!!! OMG.

(this post is crap this post is crap this post is crap this post is crap this post is crap )

First dare was for Ms HB to lick the belly button of the person opposite (emmie, in this case, who took it raher well it must be said)

And even Dave was not safe from the clutches of those evil peices of paper!

Mine however was the slightly worrying "Touch up the person next to you." I spent a good minute weighing up the possibilities (emmie or Sa) before taking the safe option. Sigh.

Afterwards the party sort of became a slightly freeforall with many things going on at once. Dave became a bit of an airhead

Emmie and Lewis began a Matrix-esque burly brawl

Sa covertly carried out her mission on Lewis

And Dave was the victim of attempted corruption by the HB once more


While Sa tucked into a phallic carrot

A fun party all round, even if the journey back was a little hurried.

After the last day of school, during which i missed the wonderful wonderful wonderfl fun of the Showcase assembly; which is only good for stopping Cheddar publicly fellate the hockey team (something they now have the Jearums for) I hastened forth to the joys of Dulwich to join Sarah and Co for the wonderful wonderful joy that was to be:

Oh yes, Sing Along Sound of Music. A trip of wonderful and magical proportions, made uberly special because it was in the most part performed in full costume. Among the crew we had several nuns, Sarah H, Sophie and Sarah


A Nazi, Jon P who is a king up to his knees in water:

And truly the star of the show, myself as Maria: (spot the difference)


Before the show actually started we had some random drag queen come on stage to instruct us in the noble art of audience participation, whilst enticing various members of the audience to come on stage and make fools of themselves

The audience themselves looked thrilled

However, the film itself was very good, and I sung along to those small tunes I knew and stayed silent for the rest. Wonderful as it was, it just reinforced my irritance for the majority of the (frankly quite forgettable) Von Trapp children, with the exception of Liesl, who i spent the majority of the film flirting with (and can you blame me?)

Halfway through the film, the interval started (and many nuns made a sharp beeline for the alcohol) and Lewis showed his pretty head and very clean underwear

There was then a fun 5 minutes whilst I assisted him into his costume for the evening, which was a rather fantastic looking hill:

Afterwards we retired to Sarah's, some to sleep, some Nazi giving me yet another reason to want his head in two bloody halves in my hands (apparantly) and then home the next day. Very fun, though maybe with all the audience shouting it may not have been the best scenario in which to watch the film for the first time. Will have ro get some DVD of it.

Next day (nearly at the present, worry not) I hopped on a train at WW, met Dave at Clock House, Lewis at Charing Cross and then to Kings Cross. For why? For twas another Peterborough/London crossover!!! Meeting Tom and Julia swiftly we departed to our first port of call, the Monument of that time the Mayor went Super Saiyan and burnt down London. Rather impressive I thought

tall no? Looks worse inside

Anyway, we ascended the stairs, and due to some severe height intolerance I spent a lot of time scanning the graffitti, noting that the infamous Flof and Serge had a new partner in their sexual deviances

I never knew. Obviously something to do with webcams... However, that was not all the interesting scrawls had to behold! No, as we noted that someone was cooking up a scheme and that Annika war heir!


However, this one was very interesting. Evidently after the relationship failed the mark needed to be amended...

However, you would be cheated without a shot of view wouldnt you! here's one, complete with Dave (who was very chuffed when i pointed out he was no longer short, with a height of about 214 feet)

After some time enjoying the fabulous views, it was decided to wind our way back down the 311 stairs to our next port of call. However, something was amiss we realised, once we passed the 400th step. We realised, we were in fact on a one way descent into the BURROW!!!

Dave wound his way down with fear in his eyes...

We passed the cage used to keep Otis's foes in check

And soon we met the snouted one himself!!! He taunted us with a cute kitty kept in a cage, before running out the back, leaving us to fight for our very lives!! Dave grabbed a pile of swords and flung them at us, before following his master through the entrance. I knew he'd betray us... nonetheless we grabbed a sword each, and hacked our way through the agents back up to solid ground and to freedom. Counting our blessings, we knew we had to alert the Judges, and were else to find them than at the HQ of geek, the Forbidden Planet Superstore in Shaftsbury avenue. We had to arm ourselves and fortify the shopfront, in case any rogue agents were following, so we quickly scanned the shelves and display cabinets (has anyone else noticed im trying to get the word count up?) and grabbed our weapons



However, we had only just braced the doors when the first blasts came, knocking several D&D geeks to the opposite walls. Tom then grabbed the Med kit (a train station Defibrillator)

and tended the weak.

Ok, actually we just looked around the geek shop at all the wonderful wonderful merchendise they had, including

ACTION FIGURES!!! And also many wonderful thingsa like ANIME! MANGA! MAGAZINES! CLONE WARS VOLUME 2!!! I was even exceedingly tempted to buy a d20 for 40p, but i decided such silliness was a bit... silly. Would have been l337. Anyway, after Tom and Jules made their purchases, we moved along to the end of the road in order to partake of some delicious pizza'ed bread. Once inside, Lewis gave Julia and Tom their seasonal gifts, a pot of moss each, which Julia took with gentle good humour

After the sumptuous feast that was the lunch, we decided to go for a general walk slowly in the direction of the Tate Modern, along the way spotting many things, which in the interests of space lessening i will let you deduce for yourselves. Mehhehehehhe









Finally we reached our destination! As we entered we found that the mahoosive trench had been filled with pile upon pile of plastic casts of cardboard boxes. A veritable snow field of them!

After the initial round of scoffing and laughing at just how unarty it actually was (cos that is NOT art, i defy you to prove otherwise) we went down and joined the gawping masses by indulging in a short game of Hide and Seek, which Julia promptly won. However, up close we could really see the artistic magnificence of a massive load of white boxes. Lewis and Tom were convinced! The Group were stunned and aghast at the sheer uberness of the art!



I then spent a good 5 minutes bullshoiting to the group about everthing I saw, much to the annoyance of Julia, although it allowed me a good snigger everytime I read what the art was ACTUALLY meant to mean only to find it was just as silly. Anyway, we looked around for a good while more and then decided that twas tim to be leaving. We had a quick crépe (puns included) and a look around the little fair type thing that was outside, before we spotted 2 angels and I proceeded to announce the Rapture to all who would listen.

But then, a demon from the depths of the earth burst from the river. It had been summoned by Otis, as the snout indicated. However, fully prepared we ignited our Lightsabers as one, and Lewis swung a mighty blow, hewing off the fell creatures head [/Tolkien]

After a round fo goodbyes and a slightly delayed train, we all wound our way home. Fun day, and was good to see those Peterborough Peeps again.

(Monday, only 4 days, 2 topics and 1 set of photos left. We're almost good!)

So, with Christmas now only 3 days away, on monday (when Christmas was 6 days away) Chris and I sought about erecting the mighty Scot's Pine that is our Christmas tree.

There's the box, complete with tree inclusive


Chris there, modelling the decorations
Then, to assemble the tree. Chris finishes his two rows

I complete the next two

And then the tree is complete!

Then the decorations naturlich. And it is here we uncover the amazing Christmas puzzle:

Untangling the goddamn lights. I hate wires... Then, with the lights on, the tree starts to look vaguely Christmassy

And vaguely more fun :D

Then Tinsel!!! Where would a tree be without a bit of tinsel here and there? Crack that tinsel whip!

Finally, baubles, modelled here by my sexy brother

But no tree is truly Christmassy without the angel on top and the obligatory dangerous balance to get it on

And our tree is complete!


And finally, our last 2 notices:

I passed my theory test! Much love to Dan for the uber revision CD, really helped a lot
With 8 votes, Fairytale of New York is the unanimous winner of the poll for Best Christmas song. Curse those Pet Shop Boys! It should have been number 1 dammit!! Lets give props to the sexy lead singer of those drunken rascals, the Pogues


Yes... lovely...

Happy Christmas y'all
'chard

Playing: Sonic 3 & Knuckles
Reading: A Game of Thrones - George R. R. Martin
Listening to: 'All I Want For Christmas Is You' - Mariah Carey
Watching: '100 Top Family Films' in about an hour, the comedy shizzle last night
Annoyed with: Her
Confused about: Are all women lesbians?!!
Mood: Scared shiteless by THAT emoticon...
Song currently stuck in head: "Fairytale of New York" - The Pogues and Kirsty MacCall
Favourite Song of the Minute: 'My Friend (So Long)' - dcTalk

Metro-sexual

Hail fair brethren! What? A blog so soon? Yes, your eyes do not decieve you fair children! 'twill be a short'un but nevertheless, a blog to make up for my absences!

First up, a few select cuttings from that wholesome publication The Metro, the LPBS croo paper of choice.

"'Beast' revealed to be a mountain lion"

Well I can't say I'm totally shocked. Aardvarks are hardly violent animals, so the agents would of course be ferocious creatures. Yes, that would be it!
Next, a short article, but one that should get you computer savvy people watering from the organs of love:

"Wanted: Terrorist website designer
AN IRAQI terrorist group has launched a competition to design its website and is offering the winner a chance to fire missles at a US army base. Sunni Muslim group Jaish Al-Taifa Al-Mansura posted the message promising the winner the chance to launch three long-range weapons from their home computer"

Now that's a prize! Better than a cut-crystal decanter and glass set any day.
Finally, a jovial one from days gone by about a snowy day in Germany:

"It's snow use trying to hide
A THIEF who slid under a parked car to siphon its petrol was run over when the driver returned and mistook him for a pile of snow. Gunther Harthof, 35, lay trapped as the owner drove backwards and forwards in a bid to free his car. The thief was rescued by a fire crew and taken to hospital in Munich"

Right. Fun?

Chard, back with pimping intentions!

So much to blog, so little time. So what have I to blog about?

Nicks 18th!
Jimmy Carr and the Stabbings!
Helen's Parté!

Yes, I and a few others recently decided to haul anchor and set sail to Germany once more, but I shall get onto that in due course, with pictures!!!
I must first apologise for the emo-style foolishness the last post exhibited. All sunny and cheery now, unless the computer breaks (which would no doubt be down to that Christmas hating Scrinch...)
However, first up was Nick's 18th, and after a quick walk to Dave's and then Matt, we were very kindly offered a lift up to Bromley South. After waiting for nick, buying our tickets, waiting a bit more then watching some chav get shouted at by the guards (something about having the wrong zone ticket and trying ot get in anyway. Nearly close to tears, had to get him mum to come and shout at them. We giggled.) Nick turned up, and informed us that the rest would be met in Victoria. We got to the platform, posed:

And got on the train. After much discussion of various topics, the only one of which i can remember was about star wars and the stormtroopers not actually being clones... or something, we got to Victoria where we found the Best David (or Dave Best, one of them) to whom we chatted jovially until Helen turned up and amused me greatly by actually being taller than someone!

Well I laughed. Anyway, we got on the Tube and found ourselves in that fun filled place that is Camden. My first jaunt in and was immediatly offered drugs. Nice deal, but i was lacking in funds. Maybe next time ;). Anyhoo, after a bit of wandering we found ourselves in a small pub called the Canaervan Arms. Well, I say in... Helen and I had to be carefully stared at and regarded before they let us in. However, thanks to my obscenely good looks, and i suppose about 10% down to Helen's immaculately combed eyebrows, they let us in and we stood the night away for a good hour or so. After a little bit however, a small three man musical group (Zarak, apparantly) came on stage and decided to regale us with a meh quality of rhythmic plunking, though a large amount of comedy when the drummer lost a stick only to knock his own cymbal over. Ah, how we laughed. After this turn of events we moved onto our second pub the Oxford Arms, which was good as we didnt get checked for ID, and for some breakdown in communication reason I got an extra pint for nothing. Score! Ahem, anyway, i did take this rather nice group photo (with matt looking the sex again)

At this point Helen looked at her phoned said some exceedingly rude words to make the very air turn BLUE, and had to rush back home. Being the chivalrous beast I am I escorted her back to Charing Cross to make sure she didnt get knifed (well, that would be the reason after the next visit to Charing X i made...) and then returned tho Victoria to meet the rest. After another train and a wonderful wonderful wonderful invention called a bus, we ventured into tesco to buy food and drink before it shut, unfortunately getting locked in


After a little bit of Godfather, me and Dave scooted off home, and I got some schleep, in preparation for the next day and...



WOO!!! THE JIMMOTHY!!! What we all had been anticipating for months weeks and days (with the appropriate numerical hand signals to each other in film lessons) had finally come! After many many travels, the group of savage hunters and assassins made their way to the Hammersmith Apollo once more. They travelled over leaking warehouses of radioactive spoog

Fixed broken seat armrests, chose the right beer


Battled hat hair and bad attempts to photograph some blondes


And who were these warriors? Only Scott, Louis Gary and Chris!!!


Eventually after a long wait and a Bo Selecta pastiche, out came the Carr himself to racuous applause and cheers! And the man was funny to a painful level. Many was the time I was doubled up in laughter, clutching my sides (for fear of them splitting. Obviously.) and his crack at epileptics (oh the man was offensive) almost had me vomiting twas so hilarious. Got a nifty shot of the stage


and we left, and after we held the door closed so scott could use the public toilet outside Hammersmith (well, closed for most of the time...hehe) we ventured back to charing cross, where we saw this cunningly fashioned gentleman:

And then we were set upon by...

THE EVIL SUPER SKINHEAD STABBY NEONAZI MEN OF CHARING CROSS!!!

Yes indeed, we were accosted by 4 of these skinheaded bastards, once being the little spokesman, setting upon 3 17 years olds despite the fact that there were several people regarding the man in pink with the same feeling. But I suppose they had, oh i dunno, bigger men with them, or more people, you know people that it would be less cowardly to pick a fight with... They came out with some classic quotes however! These included:

• You need a little more racial pride
• Queers and blacks need to be fucking executed
• You're all pathetic little cunts, you're worthless
• What would you say if a black guy gang raped your sister?
• I am a fucking nazi

After accosting Chris and Louis, the spokesperson rounded on me (who had done nothing really, not said a word) and had a go at me, before coming out with that wonderful line:

"You're worthless mate, if it weren't for these camera's I'd fucking stab you right now"

O...k...then... we got out of there once the cunts had moved on to espousing hatred elsewhere (though there was some good in all this; i got the name of and talked to a blonde we'd been making typically blokish comments on. That skirt WAS short though...) and got on our train, only to find that one of the nazis was on our train. Oh joyous and happy days! However, he left us alone since I dont think he knew we were there, and we met a load of men who were really helpful and stayed on the train for about 3 stops then left us to go the rest of the way alone. Ah well :D As it turned out, the Nazi got off at Hayes. Oh frabjousness, if i see him while out driving I'll b sure to pop a capo in his arse. I'm a musical gangsta me.

Got home, came on MSN, got comforted, went sleep. Boy wasn't that a fun trip? Well, the Jimmy bit was amazing, and on that I dwell.

-

Faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaast fooooooooooooooooooooorward! Tis now a week... erm.. *checks*yes, a week later, and I am arriving at the house of Sa for Helen's and Helen's conflicting parties. Helens involved:
Carrot munching:

Sexually explicit carrot muching:

Fancy looks from the ill

As well as Scrabble (which was damn close) and an observed game of Mao, before Sa and I moved across the land to Tulse Hill and the abode of Helen, where party number 2 was in full swing!
And there were:

Banana and croissant guns!!!

Schteve Guevara!

Rose's noses
HATSES!!!

Signs!

DAVES!

HOSTESSESSESSESSESSES!!!





SARAHS!!!



ASSORTED GUESTS!!!




But by far the highlight of my short stint was the Shakespearean masterpeice put on by Emmie Rose and Kirsten,which i have the entire video of, if it is wanted anywhere.

Alas, twas that i had to leave after only an hour, much as I would have loved to remain.

Night night to all, and I hope that was an acceptable catchup period :D

Chard of the House Daenerys

Playing: Ace Combat 5: Squadron Leader
Reading: A Game of Thrones - George R. R. Martin
Listening to: 'It Gets Me Through' Ozzy Osbourne
Watching: I 'unno
Annoyed with: 10 pm?!!! TIS EARLY!!!
Confused about: the shaguar
Mood: klototo
Song currently stuck in head: 'Soldier Side' and 'It Gets Me Through' - SOAD and Ozzy
Favourite Song of the Minute: 'My Friend (So Long)' - dcTalk